Dyson’s Gotta Go.

Enough is Enough

Our Can Opener meant to be obedient and type for us yesterday, but life happened. AGAIN. Yesterday turned into a long, exhausting day for her, and and a boring day for me and Mount Sushi.

Not that Mount Sushi minds- as long as beloved ‘Mr.Dyson’ doesn’t reach his attachment too close to her on the couch where she’s snoring. The Can Opener got the new Dyson and immediately fell in love. Look, I know it’s hard being alone after 40 years of marriage, but I think she’s a little too attached to that thing.

Every time I so much as scratch, here comes the giant bullhorn pulling up the carpet behind me. Mom says it’s a “constant battle” to get all our fur out of the carpet, the couch, the cat tree, and anything else we come into contact with. But that thing follows me around everywhere threatening to suck the whiskers right off my face. So today, she decided to vacuum the bedroom- and then she saw me in my bed.

Unfortunately, she also saw my lovely fur arrangement on my bed and I knew what she was thinking immediately- “there’s an attachment for that!”

I bolted out of there before she could even hit the “on” switch again.

Now I have to sit here on the cat tree (which for some reason only blooms when I’m around)- and wait to see what will be left of my soft, furry bed after the carpet eater attacks it. I really don’t know what she sees in that thing.

It’s him or me, Can Opener. You decide or I’ll decide for you.


12 thoughts on “Dyson’s Gotta Go.

  1. Cricket said she is with you on that one. Carpet suckers are evil and need be prohibited from existing. (The proceeding comments are not necessarily the beliefs of the typist who understands the need for the removal of shed fur)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Twiliht mee thinkss Miss Cee-O needss to et out a bit more…
    This Mistur Dyson soundss purrty pushy an sorta sucky. (Can mee meow that?)
    Wee have a mew Mistur Bissell an hee can bee a regular vacuum or a Dust Buster…an hee iss furry quiet. Mee not even leeve THE room when hee showss up.
    An mee has BellaSita Mum trained to vaccum once a week! Butt then mee iss only 1 kitty an you an Sushi make 2…..no NOT 3, just 2….. (mee can heer you thinkin Twilight….)
    **nose rubss** BellaDharma an **giggellss** BellaSita Mum

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ours comes out at least 3 times a week because the Critters like to make messes- especially when they eat- and Run back and forth from outside to inside- i would hope it would retire soon- but being she just bought that thing a few weeks ago, I have a feeling that we’re stuck with him- unless Sushi and I can lock him up someplace….

      Liked by 1 person

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