Tag Archives: cat humor

Friday Funnies

If you think I’m working out, forget about it!

This is just my way of guaranteeing I get the Can Opener’s immediate attention! šŸ˜¹

She’s busy with the Critters today- those loud things that eat everything in sight and leave a trail …. and she loves every minute of it. But that means I don’t get the attention that the Queen of the house deserves. So I decided to amuse myself while she’s occupied with the loud things.

This is how I cheer myself up, when my crown gets brushed aside…

I would tell the Can Opener I want to hang out with her, but with my luck she’d do this!
At least this cat warned his human. No warning from me!
Our Can Opener does the same thing! Every. Flipping. Day! Outrageous!
I think I’ll pack my bags- as soon as I find one that fits….

Here he is again….

Go someplace else, Smokey! This is OUR HOUSE!
I’m Smokey- and they don’t know it yet, but they’re going to adopt me.

I’ve been stealing everyone’s heart

Aren’t I cute? I’m absolutely adorable, and I know it because every neighbor around here tells me all the time. Today I visited Twilight and Sushi’s house -(they have the best food, and the Can Opener doesn’t yell at me and chase me away like some of the other neighbors). A lot of the neighbors around here are trying to help find out where I belong- if I’m lost or something.

But I keep telling them where I belong! Right HERE on Twilight’s throne! The problem is, Twilight and Sushi disagree and the Can Opener listens to them, not me. So I have to convince the Can Opener that I’m cuter than them.

So far I’m not having much luck. And the big one looks like she could eat me- so I’m kind of nervous, but the food is great in the neighborhood- and sooner or later, somebody is going to adopt me!

Mom- he’s back- get rid of him or I WILL!

FINE! I’LL GO…(But I’ll be back)…. at dinnertime!



When the Tummy Talks

Caught being Catty

I love to hunt! There’s nothing I love better than going down to the stream to fish, and to see what the other animals and ducks are doing- I watch after the little baby ducklings too when their Mamas aren’t looking…it’s just the right thing to do.

Unfortunately, Mama ducks often don’t see things my way and they come charging at me all defensive and angry. Geez. I think they might need some counseling.

But some of my buddies do a different type of hunting – (I guess because they don’t have a stream close by or lots of wild ducks and other animals hanging around). But that doesn’t stop them from hunting- it just seriously narrows their options.

Unfortunately, they get caught too-

Hmmm… Those little round things must be pretty tasty to go to all that trouble!

Something tells me someone chased him down to take those sausages back…

Well, I wouldn’t eat that stuff – but at least they caught it!


How to Train Your Humans

Later, Sushi- I have a lesson to do.

Help them Catify!

I haven’t posted a lesson for you would-be respectable cats for a while, because I’ve had my paws full around here with the critters, Sushi, and the would-be feline home invader, Smokey.

But he got me thinking… of course, if he is lost, or was left behind by a family who moved out, he needs a home, and cuddles, and food- and of course, flea treatment (for the love of Ceiling Cat, PLEASE)!

But whether a cat moves in to a home by manipulation (Smokey is good at that)- or by invitation, a respectable cat still needs to know how to train his “owners.”

Now, Smokey hasn’t been adopted (but he sure is trying)- because the Can Opener has her paws full already -(and the whole neighborhood loves him and wants him).

But for you cats who are adopted, here are a few pointers you help you train your “owners” to your specifications.

For one, help them “Catify” the house to your liking….

Claim the computer- so you can sell the other pets on ebay and make sure they’re not looking at videos of other cats.
Once you snuggle up on a lap, don’t let them get up.
Make sure they take you surfing on demand. Cats need entertainment too.
Don’t let them back-talk you.

And make sure you tell them how to fix your castle to your liking…

Make your design choices clear to the Resident in charge. Otherwise, catification won’t happen.

Sushi’s Meme Monday

I’m starting the day with some Giggles!

The Can Opener told me this morning that I’m the cutest tortie in the world- and you know? I think she has a point! She especially loves my green eyes and my white paws- (she has a thing for paws)- but she also loves what she calls my “cattitude!”

I’m glad she likes cattitude, because I’m loaded with it! I also love these other kitties who think just like I do- with CATTITUDE!

“Trust the science!” šŸ˜¹
I keep trying this on the human- but she’s too fast for me!
She’s trying to get me to do this too….
Just try it, human. My claws are sharpened and ready. (And that size wouldn’t fit me anyway).


She got the coffee anyway.

Just a few smiles to brighten your day

The Can Opener got her coffee anyway today. We told her she wasn’t allowed to have coffee until she typed for us this morning. It was a great plan we had, actually. I was going to sit in front of the Keuring and refuse to move to let her put her mug there. And Sushi was going to block the path to it, because she wasn’t able to jump up on the beverage station and block it, so we figured, “Hey- She’s never climed a mountain before, so you block the path, Sushi….”

It was actually a great plan. But Sushi didn’t get close enough to the beverage station, so Mom walked around her. And I forgot one minor detail that prevented my successfully stopping her.

She can pick me up. That figures. So she got her coffee, then got to work, without even having time for her morning devotional or workout. There goes my playtime.

Meanwhile, Sushi and I are working on plan B….

When your cat gets bored

I wonder where I could buy a rocket?

Did you know that cats are “mental?”

Not many people realize that cats need mental stimulation. We like to have challenges- and puzzles- they keep us happily occupied and ease boredom. People hate to be bored, but not many people realize their pets don’t like it anymore than they do.

Boredom leads to depression and feelings of lonliness in people and animals. What do cats do when they get bored and have to find ways to entertain themselves?

Here are a few examples;

We look for experiments to perform. Results may vary.
We may even get bored enough to try to help with laundry. The other pets in the house just may need a good washing.
We may also try to lift the spirits (and bodies) of the smaller pets in the house.
If you’re not good at interior decorating, we may volunteer to help change things up a bit.
Why, we may even help you “put away” the groceries!

Need some treats put away? We’ll help! šŸ˜¹šŸ˜¹


Caturday Cats

Thanks for the coffee, human- but you forgot the whipped cream. Can we go back to playing now?

Here’s why you need a cat- or 2, or, 4 ….

Everyone knows we cats are great companions, but we’re a lot more than that. We watch over our Can Openers in a ton of different ways- (after all, we can’t operate a can opener)-

But did you know we also help our humans around the house (besides chasing those mice and eating flies and spiders)? For example, we prevent you from slipping on your floor and getting hurt, by making sure we throw up on the carpet or your bed instead. You’re welcome.


We also help you learn how to properly care for us- like when you serve us something unacceptable and we just walk away, or bury it-(hint, hint)!

And when you try to bathe us and we claw you and run dripping through the house. Get a clue!


We’re also very concerned about the welfare of our human Can Openers (and the little Can Openers in training)… For example, we’re always happy to help you avoid those annoying trips to the vet…saving you money!

You’re welcome.


And we’re always willing to help entertain the little Can Openers or other pets in the house-

And we never mind helping keep the dog from chasing the postman or the neighbors (or us)-

Disclaimer: While we cats can help eliminate a lot of problems with dogs, unfortunately we cannot stop them from chasing parked cars.