Tag Archives: fat cat

The Can Opener’s Driving me Crazy.

She’s obsessed with my belly. Good Grief.

If she puts a cone on me, she’ll be sorry!

It finally quit raining ash, and the smoke cleared up, so a couple of days ago the Can Opener finally let me go out again and lay in a sun puddle on the doorstep in the center of her flowers. It felt so good- my own purrsonal heating pad without that annoying cord.

But a few hours after my belly-obsessed Can Opener called me in, I started scratching and pulling at my belly, and she kept trying to get me to stop, but of course, I didn’t, because DUH! I’m a CAT. I do what I want.

She was busy (what else is new)- so it took her a while to actually sit down for a few minutes and look at my belly. When she saw I had pulled some fur out, she had a catniption fit and the next thing I knew, she reached inside the kitty kit -(her evil bag of tricks she keeps all my meds and brushes in)- and out came a bottle, and she picked me up and sprayed my belly 4 times with that vile thing!

Before the spray…..
Today! After 3 sprays twice a day since Saturday.

She had called the vet, who told her to put a cone on me- lucky for me she hasn’t been able to get one yet- but she’s still looking. Meanwhile, she’s been watching me like a paranoid hawk, and on the few occasions I’d start to pull at my fur again, she’d shake the treat bag- and my head (of course), immediately popped up and I forgot what I was doing!! 😹

You know, I hate to admit it, but now I don’t mind that spray- I just sit now and let her spray me. I’m not going to tell her, but it makes the irritation go away instantly!! Don’t tell her I said that, though- I kind of have a good thing going here… If I just pretend to start chewing at myself, out come the treats!! 😻

Now it’s time for a nap!


Her Majesty, Fussypants…

Thanks for telling everybody, you moron!

Is getting the Cone of Shame!

Well, it’s true…

She’s been licking at her belly so much she has pulled off her some of her fur! The Can Opener called the vet, and they said for her to buy a cone to put on her! She has a vet appointment on the 26th – but she just had her checkup a month ago!

We both have a brand new Seresto collar, and there aren’t any fleas- we think maybe since she likes to lay outside on the porch in the evenings that maybe an ant or bee stung her or something- (it didn’t start until the day before yesterday when ash and smoke from the nearby wildfire finally cleared up and we got to go out again). And Mom’s been spraying this stuff on her (Vetericyn Plus Feline Wound and Skin Care (spray)- and already it’s looking better- and she’s pretty much stopped chewing at herself now.

But hey, Sushi- look on the bright side…. that cone could really come in handy at feeding time!!😹

See? You’ll be able to scoop more food faster!

Well, I see you licked off your sense of humor, too-


Coffee with Sushi & Twilight

Good morning Can Openers!

We’re re-training the Can Opener

We’ve been trying for the last several days to get the Can Opener to type for us but that hasn’t worked out very well. There have been a few times she sat down and started a post for us, but then something happened and she didn’t get back to it. And sometimes she tried to get back to it but started hurting in her back and knee and couldn’t concentrate, so our draft folder is full of unfinished ideas we gave her.

We’re changing her schedule (she’s objecting)- because she just can’t seem to keep things on her previous schedule before our Backup Can Opener went to heaven. But we have the same schedule, so that means we have to retrain her! Meanwhile….

I help Mom keep Sushi groomed…
That is until she calls me “Tuna Breath!”

This morning it’s beautiful and sunny and after eating and grooming Sushi for Mom, I went outside to lay in my favorite sun puddle while the Can Opener made her coffee and started her morning routine…

Oh yes- this is my HAPPY PLACE!

Then Sushi decided she wasn’t ready for the Can Opener to do her usual brushing, so instead of settling in on Mom’s lap while she has her coffee, Sushi decided to snuggle into her soft, furry bed instead-

She was all settled in and cozy and then…
In walked “Mr.Smokey”- intent on stealing our Can Opener’s heart (and food)-
He was getting all nice and cozy…

And then he looked up and saw Sushi in her bed and growled and flew out the door and down the street!!! 😹

Maybe the Can Opener should take Sushi off her diet- he looked at her (and her “What are you doing here?” look, and decided it was time to move on! Apparently he isn’t used to being confronted by a cat twice his size! 😹



Sunbathing Sushi

I found a purrfect spot under the lilac tree! I think I’ll stay here (until it gets too hot)…

Hot again today- But I got a spot…

Yesterday it was hot enough to melt the mailbox. I tried to go out and lay on the front doorstep in the evening like I normally do, but it was too hot. I turned right around and collapsed onto the cool floor inside, while the Can Opener reminded me, “I told you sweetie it was going to feel like an oven! Come back to the couch!”

The next thing I knew, I was being hoisted up and placed on the couch on my favorite soft blankie. She handed me my silvervine and a treat, and I could feel the air conditioning and fell asleep right away.

Today she suggested that I go out early (right after she watered the garden)- so I did, because for once, it wasn’t cold in the morning. But then, I noticed a nice grassy spot I hadn’t noticed before. Right under the lilac tree. I claimed it before Twilight could!

Oh yes. Nice and cool and shady. Soft grass and the occaisonal butterfly comes along to say hello.

But now, she says I have to come in. I’ve been out here since 9:00 this morning (loving it)- but now it’s 3 in the afternoon and things are getting hotter. Back to the couch!

She got the coffee anyway.

Just a few smiles to brighten your day

The Can Opener got her coffee anyway today. We told her she wasn’t allowed to have coffee until she typed for us this morning. It was a great plan we had, actually. I was going to sit in front of the Keuring and refuse to move to let her put her mug there. And Sushi was going to block the path to it, because she wasn’t able to jump up on the beverage station and block it, so we figured, “Hey- She’s never climed a mountain before, so you block the path, Sushi….”

It was actually a great plan. But Sushi didn’t get close enough to the beverage station, so Mom walked around her. And I forgot one minor detail that prevented my successfully stopping her.

She can pick me up. That figures. So she got her coffee, then got to work, without even having time for her morning devotional or workout. There goes my playtime.

Meanwhile, Sushi and I are working on plan B….

Sushi’s Diet Chronicles

Oops. I did it again!

The Can Opener has been really trying hard to help me trim down. But short of a pair of scissors, I don’t think it’s happening!

You see, the problem is, there’s food. And where there’s food, I’m there too… that is, as soon as I can get there. And if she opens tuna, I’m there a lot faster!

And it doesn’t help that Skinny little miss Twilight saunters by all slim and slick and makes me look like Mount Everest. I told her to quit doing that, but she never listens. And she gives me these snide looks when the Can Opener gives her treats as if to say, “I get more than you!

(Twilight)- No I don’t, Mount -Sushi! And I can’t help it if I’m “slim and slick”- That’s because I don’t lay my head in my food bowl… and besides, I hunt all day, and all night if Mom lets me stay out- but the only thing you hunt is treats!

Mom- You might want to let Twilight out now-one of these days, I’m going to slither up behind her and SQUASH her like a bug!

By the way, is that salmon I smell?


Caturday Craftiness

Does something look “off” in this picture? There’s a reason for that!!! 😹

I got even with SHEBA!! MWAHAHA!😹

She had it coming! That crazy psycho cat that belongs to the Can Opener’s sister has been asking for trouble for a year now. She slithers into my house anytime she feels like it, and hops up on my cat tree- and sits in MY bedroom window, and snoops around looking for MY treats and demands food from MY human- she does this because her Mom and our Can Opener are sisters-

She has always been free to come in my house, and I was always free to go into her house before- but that was before she saw me let her Mom pet me. Ever since then, if the Can Opener goes to her sisters house, and I follow her, slithering Sheba, sneaks up to me and growls and chases me off! Sometimes, even when she comes into my house she tries to chase me out- that’s when I see a side of the Can Opener that I never knew existed….Nothing gets her dander up like messing with me or Sushi! Or her two-legged Critters.

She puts little Miss Slither-Butt in her place right away, and lets her know she can’t come in our house if she’s going to growl at me or Sushi- (oddly enough, Sushi just looks at her, and Sheba runs out)- I can’t figure out why she never bothers Sushi- unless maybe because She doesn’t know how to chase a mountain.

But I got enough of Miss Slither-Butt today- and when the Can Opener went to see her sister I followed her, prepared for a battle. Lucky for me, Slither-Butt was out someplace- (I don’t like a fight)- so I took adavantage of the opportunity to “repay” her Royal Hiney.

I let her Mom pet me all she wanted (to make sure when she pet Sheba again, MY scent will be all over her Mom)!!!!! 😹 And then, I played with all her toys (she has some fun toys- hint, hint, Mom)!

And then,….My favorite part of all….

Take that, Ms. Slither-Butt!

I’m giving the Can Opener a break- for tonight!

Not that she deserves it, mind you- but I want treats!

That Dang Vet told her to cut back my treats!

This is because at my last visit, I had gained weight- (because of that steroid shot they gave me last summer)- so the Can Opener doesn’t let me “free feed” anymore- now I get fed at specific times of day (on the Can Opener’s open schedule)- I’ll starve!!!!

I think I’ve already lost a few precious ounces… my paws feel smaller- I think that’s enough- besides, when she brushes me, she brushes off at least 3 pounds of my fur- and I’m sure some of that has to be Twilight’s fur that just kind of landed on me when she walked by.

So if part of my “weight” is just fur- and if most of that is Twilight’s fur that just settles on me when I’m minding my own business, sleeping in the carpet… then WHY am I on a diet?

I think she should just suck Twilight up in the vacuum and I’ll immediately lose weight. Think she’ll believe me?

Me either- But tomorrow I’m going to try to convince her. Meanwhile, I’m going to cuddle her tonight and be really, really sweet- maybe she’ll cut me some slack in the morning and load me up on treats!

After all, it’s not my fault that I’m 17 pounds of pure love!
There’s always option two….

Sushi’s Friday Furballs

Well, Hello there. How you doin?

Just in case you needed a smile, Here I am!

I stopped my busy napping schedule to pop in on you and see how you’re all doing. The Can Opener has been (thinking) she’s getting me used to the eye medicine she keeps abusing me with three times a day (in league with the vet). But I actually have her eating out of my adorable little paw.

What she doesn’t realize is that I’m pretending I don’t mind because in spite of all my efforts, she still manages to get that nasty stuff in both my eyes. I still hate it. But I know that if I act all sweet and compliant, she’ll praise me in the manner I truly deserve and load me up with treats as soon as she’s done.

Then, (thinking I’m all upset and that my eyes possibly sting when she’s done)- she decides that’s the purrfect time to “calm me down” by giving me a nice, long, brushing session with my favorite brush.

Of course, I have my tricks to make her stretch it out as long as possible, until she HAS to do something else… some completely useless thing like, oh, I don’t know… cleaning, or laundry, or cooking, or watching those Critters, or helping her sister, or checking her mail, or going to the doctor- or, exercising- just those trivial things that can’t possibly compare with the honor of taking care of adorable little me.

She assures me that soon we won’t need to “do this” anymore- so then I’ll have to come up with another plan to keep her under control. But for now- I’ll let her think she’s winning, and steal her spot the minute she gets up!

Don’t worry, Mom. I’ll finish your coffee and walnuts.